private lessons, big classes, small classes—- and MINDSET

Over the years, I’ve taught group violin, piano, guitar, science, photomath, farsi, swimming, social studies, math, and more — to students of all ages, from private one-on-one lessons to shared lessons with two students, to group classes with up to eight kids, and whole class sizes at fairfax county and montgomery county public schools. I’ve worked with kindergartners, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, and 6th graders, and through all these experiences, I’ve learned so much about the benefits of big groups vs. small groups.

What I’ve found is that it’s not always about the class size — it’s about the kid. Their level, their personality, and more importantly, their mindset.

If you’re at all familiar with the concept of fixed mindset vs. growth mindset, you probably already have a sense of how your child approaches learning. Maybe you even recognize which one you grew up with. I know I grew up with a growth mindset — like many immigrant families (mine came from Iran), I was taught that success comes from effort, not just talent.

A growth mindset is the belief that skills can be developed through dedication and hard work — even if you’re not naturally “gifted.” On the other hand, a fixed mindset is when a child believes, “If I’m not immediately good at this, it means I’m bad at it — and I’m never trying again.” That fear of failure becomes a wall that blocks progress.

So if you ask me whether I’d rather teach a child with tons of talent or a child with a growth mindset — I’ll always lean toward mindset. Talent is great, but a fixed mindset can be a major obstacle to growth.

That’s why, in every class, I try to frame my compliments and critiques in a way that supports a growth mindset. I focus on effort, not just results — and I encourage you to do the same at home.

For example, when you talk to your kids about swimming, praise them for:

• Trying something new, even if it’s hard.

• Choosing not to use flippers during the whole lesson to challenge themselves.

• Pushing through exhaustion and continuing to improve.

• Remembering to do their hummingbird bubble homework three days in a row!

These are the kinds of behaviors that build resilience and confidence — not just in swimming, but in life.

When a child refuses to put their head under the water or won’t try the deep end, that’s not a swimming problem — that’s a mindset problem. It’s a decision they’ve already made in their head. I can help shift it, but I need your help too. Talk to them. Encourage them. Let them know they can grow — that it’s okay to struggle, and it’s worth it to keep going.

Now, about big vs. small classes: I know everyone has their preferences. Some kids are more coddled, and others thrive in a competitive, “survival of the fittest” setting. Neither is right or wrong — they just require different approaches.

In bigger classes (like some of our Friday groups), it can be harder to get my attention, which is why I’m bringing on another coach to help. Some kids rise to the occasion. Others might check out. That’s normal. I’ve noticed that kids with a growth mindset tend to thrive in larger groups — they keep trying no matter what. Kids who struggle with a fixed mindset may benefit more from a smaller setting where they feel safer to try.

The most important takeaway? You play a huge role in shaping how your child sees themselves. Help them focus on effort, growth, and learning from challenges. Let them know it’s okay to mess up, as long as they keep going.

And as always — I’m here. I care. You can text me any time, and I’ll call you back when I can. We’re in this together.

— Coach Shaady